Bits of Luwi

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Archive for the tag “growing up”

Woman Crush Wednesday – Lulu Haangala

So its day two of my zed blogger challenge and I thought its Wednesday what better to write about that a female who inspires me. Now I won’t pretend to be deep and all that picking on someone whose name I can’t pronounce or spell right. No. I have decided to pick someone close to home. My big sister the beautiful ūüôā Luyando Haangala..¬†

To some she is just some annoying loud little girl who jumps up and down in front of a camera making noise, to others she is a person they look at in awe and aspire to be like but for me she is my sister who is an amazing Mother to an even more amazing little girl, she is an amazing friend and she is an even more amazing sister.

the gorgeous Asante

What is so inspiring about her you may wonder? Her story. She may be an annoying loud little girl who jumps up and down in front of a camera making noise, but she had a dream to get behind the camera and she worked hard until she got that dream. I would like to go into depth about her struggle to get where she is today which is as one of the few delegates selected to the Washington Young African Leaders Fellowship, but I am not sure she would permit me to do so. She is probably saving that for her memoirs and I would not want to preempt that ;-). 

I remember her singing when she was 5 years old, in an off key voice of course (not every 5 year old is blessed with talent at that early age) but she knew what she wanted and guess what that 5 year old ended up being invited to sing for Zambia’s 1st Republican President!!!

the five year old with a voice that sings off key and a dream!!!

When she came back to Zambia, she had a dream of a future she wanted, many looked at her as a dreamer, others, laughed her off, others helped ūüôā and now she is slowly but surely watching her dreams come to light.¬†

Walt Disney said “All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them.” I am grateful for my sister because she gives me the courage to pursue my dreams. She truly makes me believe that impossible is nothing.¬†

My name is Lweendo and I am a Zed Blogger x

zed blogger

Taking stock

Some people believe in looking back on the past chastising themselves for the things they feel they did wrong and thereafter trying to atone for the reproachable behavior , in as much as this may have worked for some people, it has never worked for me. I truly do well believe in the motto no regrets in life just lessons learned.

So for instance I was with someone for almost four years was convinced wedding bells were surley the next step that our relationship would take but life had other plans. I dont look back on that and say wow thats three years of my life I will never get back. No, but instead from each fight I took a lesson, from each kind gesture I took away a lesson , from each episode of mistrust, I took away a lesson. 

As for the accident that apparently should have ended my life (again, God has other plans) I took away vauable lessons about family and friendship.Yes, even one of the most horrific traumatising things to happen to me as an adolosecent I found a lesson to take away from. oh and that I should be more patient when crossing the road (LOL)

They (dont ask me who) say that the best person to give advice to someone is some one who experienced the issue first hand.They also say you cannot truly comfort a person unless you feel thier pain. I concur with them, who ever they are. I try as much as possible to limit the advice I give out to situations I have experienced myself, because I believe that you can never truly understand unless you can relate.

WAIT!!What was my point again?? or right, taking stock.¬† of what exactly?? your life, where it has been , where it seems to be headed, where you want it to be headed. it is very important to once in a while take stock of all the lessons learnt and put them to good use . People tend to do that at the end of every year and then give themselves resolutions which they never stick to and they end up disappointed with themselves at the end of the year and promise to do better the next year. Not me . So the next time you are asked why you doing something that you never did before or are going out of your way like never before, a good answer is always “People change , I have learned”

And as you take stock , you will realise that your life may not be working out the way YOU planned it, but thats ok :).xx

 

 

 

Happily Never After

“pick me, choose me, love me.” are the words she wanted to scream at him as she stood there before him, her world seemingly crashing around her, her heart beating so slow it was as if it would stop at any minute.

“Its you, it has always been you, and it will always be you” are the words she hoped she would hear him say but alas, they were not to come and so she turned and walked away into her happily never after.

Growing up,¬†I must admit I¬†was one of those kids that lived for the fairytale.¬†Cinderella, Snow White, all spoke¬†of personal pain and suffereing and happiness in¬†the end. So naturally, ¬†I was one of those kids that hoped to be rescued from my evilnstepmother or whatever bondage I had to unhappiness¬†by my very own dashing prince charming and we would ride on in the sunset to our happily ever after. Not on a white horse of course but maybe in a ferarri. But sadly the bitch that is growing up makes you ralise that it is all but a dream. Plus I came to be realised that I was too fiercly stubborn and independent to be ummmm ‘rescued’.

So I grew up, but sadly instead of actually erasing the fairytale dream from my life, you would think that this was the end of my dependence on¬†others and the birth of a fiercely independent female who needed noone¬†for self validation, ego feeding and all that, but alas,¬†I merely replaced it with the¬†dream that one day¬†someone would come into my life and put me first always and no matter what. Really that is all people search in relationships, someone to love them unconditionally, some one not looking for an angel but willing to be with you flaws and all. Some one to put your needs ahead of not only theirs but everyone else’s needs. The more lifen throws at me the more I come to see that even this is a notion that is a mere facade and does not exist, not on this plane anyway.¬† So a new lesson is slowly being embedded into my thick brain, that is only I can put myself first. Only I can love myself unconditionally and put my needs above the needs of all others.

“She looked on from her happy never after,¬†her eyes like a window albiet foggy from the tears she was fighting back seeing things almost as clear as day¬†as he carried on with his happy ever after.”

Crossroad Conundrums

yes, that is me trying to sound smart and insightful. Ok, maybe not. I really am at a crossroads in my life finding myself needing to take one way or the other and I honestly do not know which route to take and I have no one to turn to for objective advice. Growing up really sucks. It should come with a warning label.

  if that said do not grow up unless you absolutely have to, or proceed with caution, and I was shown this label when growing up, I promise you, I would not be typing this right now. Lol

anyway, so I have found myself with this huge decision to make and honestly sometimes I wish I could put a pause on life and fast forward it to where I would like for it to be. The main issue I have is not being on the same page with people I care about. It just becomes so difficult once you grow up especially when you are done with your under graduate degree.. bring on the pressure of having to move out of the house, finding a suitable partner if you didnt find one already in university, getting married. bills *insert high pitch scream here*

I get that not all your friends will be with you for your life time and probably the guy you date in college is not the guy you marry but WHY, WHY must it be that way?? why cant things be simple without one having to worry about making sure the people around you are insync with you?? two words come to to mind which as one grows seem synoymous, responsibility and maturity..

One must make responsible decisions. be it financially or otherwise especially financially. that is the most important one of all as with financial maturity comes all else. but for one to grow financially or other wise you need to be on the same page as most of the people you decide to surround yourself with. Sadly I look around and I worry that by the end of the year I will not be in touch with some of the people in my life right now. but hey such is the burden that comes with growing up..xx

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