I dont know where to start this post from to be honest. I havent blogged in a while because well so much has been going on in my life most of which I wanted to keep to myself and you know how they say ‘a good writer, will always write what they know’ or someyhing like that. . And as a person who found solace in writing, you can imagine what I kept bottled up. I scribbled here and there but it was never enough.
Anyway, like I said so I much has happened in my life in this past year and I have had a lot of shoulda woulda coulda moments. To say its been a bitter-sweet year would be grossly understating the fact. For the longest time I felt alone and like I couldnt turn to anyone. My life was somewhat spiralling, my emotional health something to be desired. All I wanted was refuge, someone who could be there for me without judgement, no questions asked anytime of the day but the one person I thought could be my refuge could not be my refuge anymore. And it was quite a rocky road I was on.
I have done alot in my life. Some things I’m not so proud of others make me beam just at the thought of them. Hurt some people, gotten hurt along the way but I guess such is the cycle of life and growth. I grew alot this year and it wasn’t easy to accept certain things in my life happened for a reason, so I prayed about it and moved on… I feel like I’m rambling and not making much sense now lol..
And then on 25 th september my life changed. My refuge was born. My son,my whole life. . Now I know what you are thinking how is this refuge? He cant exactly talk back to me when I need to talk to be someone but whenever I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders I look at him and the tears disappear and so does the heaviness in my heart. I may have done alot of wrong things in my life but out of all the wrong he is the one thing I feel I got spot on. My refuge is heaven sent♥